Are You Done Yet?

It’s been a week or so since I’ve written anything, between sickness and traveling, I have hardly time to remember my own name let alone write about anything. And to be honest my craftiness and joy of life in general was vomited out of me, thanks flu season.

But now, I am feeling great, fall is here, and my daily dose of pumpkin related warm drinks are being met. Now if this damn baby would hurry up and get out of me, I would be supremely happy.

The greatest joy of pregnancy. A built in table.

I have 11 weeks left, and I am dying. Something about those last three months seem to drag on each time I reach this point. I don’t know if it’s my incessant urge to cuddle shit, or the fact that the slightest poke to my stomach makes me feel like I am near explosion, but I am ready.

I did find out recently that I am anemic, which explains my love of naps during this pregnancy. So after marching down to the grocery store and purchasing a lifetime supply of iron tablets, I have found that I am much more alert and awake feeling, which really needed to happen. I have Monster’s birthday coming up in 22 days, my husband’s arrival home in 19 days, Halloween, and a baby to prepare for. And I haven’t really done more than name the thing, so it’s time to get on it.

The great thing about this being my second human, I have come to learn there are things that you just don’t need to purchase. But also due to our last minute drunken “I want a baby” planning skills, we also weren’t totally planning to reproduce, so I gave away a lot of Monster’s infant items to people who need it more than I did at the time. But that’s alright. I am giving myself a 500 dollar budget to purchase everything I will need, and I plan to not go a single penny over that. Actually, far under that would be nice. So here is a list of what I have learned you really need (not want) for your little human. I will let you know how well I actually do.

Items Needed for Survival of Human Infant

Toddler Bed

Now this isn’t for the fetus, this is for my Monster. After looking at crib after crib, and seeing that I will not get one for much less that 150 dollars that is convertible as the one we have now for Layla, we decided to go with a toddler bed for her. The benefit is it makes Monster feel special too, to get something new. And I found a bright pink wooden frame for only 69.95. But I still do need another mattress, so that’ll be about 70 dollars like it was for Layla’s.

Breast Pump

With the first, I breast fed for two measly months. I was having a difficult time figuring out how to actually feed her correctly, and didn’t have much help for guidance. And the breast pump I did have was a single hand pump. Cheap, and just a little more effort than a electric pump. The problem I ran into was every time I pumped one milk jug, the other leaked. And hand pumping yourself is quite the task. So this time around I am going for a double pump, electric, and I will not spend over 150 dollars on this. So researching away is my newest addition to my never ending to do list.

Monitor

Again, something I gave away. But in our old apartment, there was really no need for one. We were crammed into about 800 sq feet, so we could hear her from any part of our household. But as we have grown up, and gotten real jobs and a real home, I find that it will be necessary to purchase one. Currently my husband is in charge of this, because he is the techy nerd of our relationship, and he is wanting a video monitor. And this is why; with Layla, up until she was…well let’s be honest, even now, if she makes a subtle peep, he is sprinting to see what’s wrong. Is she suffocating on her pillow? Did she get kidnapped? Did the boogie man ACTUALLY come out of the closet and steal her away, leaving nothing but an IOU? He is dramatic, but it is his princess. With a video monitor, he feels a little less stress, being able to look and see what is wrong before he sprints to her rescue.

Medicines

This is important. With the first, we were young, and had no idea what a child needed when it came to health. There were many trips back and forth, back and forth to the store to purchase little things here and there. So I made a list of all that came in handy with Layla, that her doctor had recommended for one ailment or another at some point.

  • Gas relief drops
  • Tylenol
  • Motrin
  • Vasoline/Bag Balm/Baby Powder/Detestin (All great for diaper rashes)
  • Pedialyte
  • Emena’s (Because, someday, you may have to shove one up his/her butt to help them poo. It’s no bueno)
  • Orajel

These are just the basics that we found helpful, I am sure there are more out there that I have no idea about, I would love to hear them though :)

Clothes

Damn my ability to give to others in need, otherwise this wouldn’t be on my list. I had Layla at the tail end of Fall. This one is during the dead of Winter. I was totally prepared with coats, blankets, fleece bodysuits galore. Alas, I suck.

So I do need to go purchase the essentials. But seriously, and I hope someone takes my advice. You do NOT need the fancy shit. Did you understand that? This is a helpless little creature. It’s favorite activities are eating, sleeping and pooping. A hobby is puking. There is no need for a tiny faux vest, with leggings, a skirt and a butt cover. When your child has a major blowout in it’s pants, and you didn’t listen to my advice, well shame on you. Yes, it may be cold outside, but there are ways to dress a child simply, and still keep it from being an infantsicle.

All I am planning to buy are:

  • Onsies – Long and short sleeved
  • Pants
  • Fleece bodysuits
  • Socks
  • Blankets galore.
  • Hats

That’s it. No tiny stupid purses, or tights or anything of that sort. It’s silly. I am not trying to parade my child around and scream to the world she is adorable AND fashionable. I am going for the easiest outfits to put on the child, keep it warm and keep it comfy. And honestly, newborns grow soooo fast. Layla was born 6 lbs 10 oz. Within 30 days she doubled her weight. And that means the millions of different outfits you may have bought are seemingly useless. Same with diapers. Within a week and a half, we were up a size in diapers. By six months old, we had gone up two more sizes. You can’t plan your child down to it’s weight and growth development. These are all things I prefer to buy as we go.

Bedding

The nice thing about this, is it’s purely for looks. I already have sheets up the ass hole for Layla, so now I am just needing something cute to dress up Caroline’s room. I did find a 10 piece set, which included decorations, for only 99 dollars. Not too bad considering the average cost of a bedding set for a 19 inch long creature is 150 dollars. What the Frank?

That’s It??

Yes. Thank god. I have calculated it all out to be about 492 dollars. Let’s see if I can go below that. But the perks of having Layla and this human so close together, is a lot of things still work for me. We have a carseat, a stroller (not like I ever use it anyways), a high chair, a bouncing chair, toys, toys, TOYS, nail clippers, booger suckers, baby towels, lotions, washes, brushes, play mats, swing, johnny jumper….did I mention toys?

Poor Layla isn’t allowed in Caroline’s room because it’s like a wonderland of toys from years past, and I have not decided how to explain that she cannot fit in the swing anymore.

But a lot of the items we already have, aren’t fully needed. You don’t need a swing to survive, it is just something to entertain them. And the high chair isn’t introduced until human can hold her head up securely and almost sit up on her own.

We left the hospital two years ago with a baby and a carseat, along with an excess amount of clothes. But that was it. I survived motherhood on a tiny, teeny budget. And I learned that it’s not the items you have, it’s the love you provide. So decide for yourself what is needed. This is what I have chosen.

And I am done ranting.

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2 responses to “Are You Done Yet?

  1. I think I’m glad that I had a boy first….If he had been a girl, I probably would have wasted a lot of money on frilly girly clothes. I think I still will when I do have a girl, but maybe not as many…And I do hope that I didn’t waste 200 bucks on my stroller/carseat travel system. Fingers crossed that I actually use it in the Spring haha.

    • I think a stroller is useful if your really active or go to the mall a lot. But really, it just became a huge waste for me, and thankfully mine was given to me. It filled up my trunk, or it was forgotten at the certain times it came in handy, and by the time it was warm and we were active again, Layla was walking, so we liked to let her walk. She never sat still in it for long, so it ended up being me or Alex pushing an empty stroller while the other one is either carrying the kid or chasing the kid. I will probably not use it again this time around, but it’s personal preference.

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